Yesterday, I was featured in Germany’s Berliner Zeitung newspaper.
The article, headlined with the German translation of ‘under the ropes’, talks about the rising popularity of Muay Thai for women.
Writer Caroline Bock came to train with me at Attachai Muay Thai for an afternoon last month for her very first session. After we’d finished, she interviewed me about my experience in Muay Thai and gender equality in Thailand.
You can read an online version of the article, which is titled ‘Wie Frauen das Thaiboxen erobern’ or ‘How Women Conquer Muay Thai’ on the Berliner Zeitung website.
There are also versions of the same article on several other German language websites:
Thaiboxen Wird Bei Frauen Beliebter (Thai Boxing is Becoming More Popular Among Women) for the Morgen Post.
Thaiboxen Wird Bei Frauen Beliebter for RadioBeilefeld.de
Thaiboxen Wird Bei Frauen Beleibter for Handelsblatt.
Thaiboxen Wird Bei Frauen Beleibter for the Main Post.
Unter den Seilen for Der Farang.
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Under The Ropes 
A friend of mine is going through horrific abuse. Coercive control, gaslighting, surveillance cameras, emotional abuse, preventing from going back to uni.
Embassy has already been contacted to no avail. Talking to doctors and there’s a lot of victim blaming (as my friend is gay male EU).
Thoughts or advice please?
I’m so sorry to hear of what your friend is going through. I reached out to some case worker friends to ask about this, as coercive control is not really understood in the Thai legal system. They recommend he reach out to Counsellors for Justice (counsellorsforjustice@gmail.com), it’s a free counselling group that should be able to provide some assistance. Failing that, please feel free to reach out to me again and I will see what else we can do.
Hi Emma,
Thank you so much for replying. It’s a bit challenging to ask about this because one doesn’t want to overwhelm or tigger people.
At the same time, Embassy staff doesn’t have any empathy ( a bit harsh actually), and it’s difficult to explain how this works/feels to people who (most likely) never went through it.
I understand it’s not easy to reply to these random questions, but this helps a lot. It’s much appreciated, and perhaps I can get back to you if or when progress is made. I hope you’re doing well.
Hi Emma,
Erm, no luck with responses.
Would there be any ideas in terms of social support/groups in Bangkok area please? As much as one wants to get through and not make a fuss, it hasn’t been that easy.
Some progress has been made in terms of social support, though perhaps it’d be sensible to see if anything else is avalible in Bangkok area. One thinks this should have been much easier but it appears to be hard work.
I totally understand if you’re busy with your own life. This is not to add to your problems, just ask because most things have been tried. Saying no or I don’t know is totally ok too.
Hi,
Apologies, I think this inadvertently added more stress to someone else’s life.
No need to do anything. Thank you for replying and once again sorry for the inconvinience.
I totally understand. Nevertheless, I’ll still look into options. Feel free to come back to me in the future if you need to.
Thank you, Emma. I didn’t read this because there was a lot of holiday stress, but I appreciate your reply.
I read this today and it resondated with me:
(It was a Reddit thread on “When did you realize that your marriage was over”)
When I was driving home from work and thought “If that Mack Truck T-Bones me, I won’t have to go home today.”
It was totally out of the blue and very uncharacteristic for me to think anything like that. I gave myself my own wake up call, that I would rather be killed/end up in the hospital than go home to my now ex.
(end quote)
I reckon a lot of problems are caused by this place. Shame for being different (just a foreigner), acceptable lies (constant lies), lack of infrastructure. I live in this constant state of dread because I just inherently know I made a mistake coming here. But it’s ridiculous being forced to stay with an abuser just because you were naive. Even in Norway, when people go to prison, they get to have a second chance at life, and back in society.
This is a prison, with no opportunities, and constant dread one pays to stay in. I just want out, Emma.
Hi,
Could you kindly please remove post that mentions organisations? My fault
Is there a way to get in touch with you? I’d just like some advice. Isolation or abuse is hard.
Hi,
Would you like me to remove the comment thread, or just one particular comment? Just let me know and I’ll do that right away. The best way to get in touch with me is by sending a direct message here: https://www.facebook.com/undertheropes
Hi,
I checked and everything looks ok right now — no need for deletion.
I don’t have Facebook (isolation) but I can create one.
I’d just like some support or to touch base with someone safe from time to time.
Would this be reasonable?
We can’t possibly let abusers get away and then have victims blamed.
I live very far from central BTS and MRT Bangkok.